Embracing change

Morgan Rooney
MSMU Class of 2020

(8/2018) No one can ever be fully prepared for the life-changing transition between high school to college. For many, it’s the first time on their own, and the first time they are faced with adult tasks ad responsibilities. Although I could give some advice regarding budgeting your money, eating healthy, or time management, these subjects may come as common sense to most. If I could tell my past self anything about moving away from my family and going to college, I would tell my newly high-school-graduated self not to be afraid to put myself out there, and to embrace change in all forms.

By "putting yourself out there", I don’t necessarily mean putting yourself in highly risky situations. I don’t think anyone should put him/herself directly in harm's way, whether that be through drugs or other obvious dangers, but I do think that risk-taking is a great way to keep your college life interesting. Spending time with groups that you normally wouldn’t have before, or signing up for that day trip that looked interesting to you are good places to start.

Doing new things without a close friend by your side may make you feel uncomfortable at first. As someone who is quite introverted, this was a challenge I faced when I first arrived at college two years ago. In fact, I would avoid going to certain activities so that I wouldn’t have to go alone. I felt that if I went someplace alone, others may think that I don’t have any friends (which sounds ridiculous to me now). Although it is something I have improved upon a lot, it is still something I admit that I struggle with. I went from not wanting to go to the gym by myself to traveling to Ireland alone. The best way that I can put it is that we all came into this world alone, and we are all individuals, therefore there is absolutely no shame in doing things or spending time in your own company. A certain amount of independence and alone time is good for us.

Although I’ve highlighted the importance of solitude and independence, which can be "putting yourself out there" for some people, sometimes just the opposite is something some people are uncomfortable with. Because many of us have lived in the same place for the majority of our lives, making friends may not come as naturally as you may think. At least, making new friends came as a challenge for me. It wasn’t difficult because I was particularly "weird" or "strange" to the point that it would be a barrier when trying to build relationships with new people, but because I had been friends with all of my closest friends for many years. Those close friendships developed slowly through the years and took time. To suddenly move away to a new place where none of my friendships would follow me was overwhelming. It is those independent journeys you take that will help you develop new friends so that you will be independent, but not lonely.

Many of your hobbies may come with you, like if you play the guitar or like to go for a run in the mornings, but there is so much opportunity for finding new activities and hobbies. Everyone is new upon arrival, so it is perfect timing to try something new when everyone else is in the same situation. You are much less likely to feel uncomfortable because everyone is new, and it is the perfect opportunity to meet people with similar interests as you have. You usually don’t even have to have a great about of knowledge on the subject at all. A friend of mine in my first year of college signed up for the rugby team, although she didn’t even know how to play when she first got there. She picked up on the sport very quickly and loves it to this day. Taking that sculpting course or attending the Saturday morning yoga class shouldn’t be something to fear.

With all the excitement of coming to college, there is also a lot you are leaving behind back home. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it takes some to get used to. Last semester I attended a lecture on mental health for college students. One of the problems that the lecturers brought up was that certain things that brought the students comfort at home when they felt anxious, stressed, or upset were gone. I found this statement very relatable. One of the things that made me feel very at peace when I was facing something stressful was hopping in the car and going for a long drive to clear my head. When I first arrived to college, I didn’t have a car with me, so I had to come up with different way to relax. Something that worked for me personally was going for a long walk and enjoying the local scenery when the weather was nice. If it was too cold, I would stay in my bed, make myself a cup of tea and listen to music. Although these methods may not work for everyone, the point is that with a big change in life, you may have to change more than you want to. It just takes time to figure things out for yourself. No one can tell you how to live.

Restructuring your life is much more difficult for some people than others depending on your personality and other situational circumstances, but it is possible (and necessary) for everyone. Change is scary on the surface but there is absolutely nothing wrong with it and it shouldn’t be something we shy away from. Change is good and helps us grow into better adults. The responsibility is greater but so is the payoff. Remember that college is all about learning, but that doesn’t only mean academics.

Lastly, as college is very important, definitely don’t be afraid to have fun. Loosen up a bit, but don’t forget about your safety and responsibilities. It’s your life; you can shape it into whatever you want it to be, and this is the time to do so.

Read other articles by Morgan Rooney