Mary Angel

(4/2022) Another month gone by and here we are again. I am in a funk. Today my second brand new computer started acting up at work, my daughter woke up with a rash from head to toe, and my amazing aunt passed away. I just can’t shake the feeling of being overwhelmed and just plain exhausted, followed by guilt over my self-pity. Normally I would say "I made the mistake of jumping on social media", but this time it worked out the way I think social media should work.

Usually I would be spouting off about all the negative aspects of social media and how it is causing anxiety and stress, and rotting our children’s brains (and ours), but this time I went on for the specific purpose of posting pics of my amazing aunt. She had an amazing husband, two wonderful adult children, and 3 loving grandchildren. I wanted everyone who knew her to have pics to remember her by. I still remember all the times I spent at her house, from the long walks, to the swarm of bees in the barn, and the games in the spring house. As I was on the app I noticed pictures of other people I haven’t seen in a while and then I noticed a link that said "see more memories", so I clicked on it because that was the whole reason I was on there.

What I found was just the medicine I needed. There were pics and comments I had posted from 3 years, 5 years, and as much as 12 years ago. The pictures of my babies, as they grew up, were smiles I could keep with me all day. I pulled out the screenshots every time the mood struck me and I loved it! There were pictures from 12 years ago at the Father Daughter Dance at our old church that couldn’t have been any cuter if they tried. The one where my husband and the girls were trying to make funny faces was both sweet and hysterical at the same time.

Many of you know our family loves our staycations and pictures of past staycations are no different. It makes me smile (sometimes in amazement) at how many different places we have gone over the years. The four kids wrestling from 8 years ago may always be one of my favorites. I can still hear the girls come in the living room and point at my oldest and say, "Get on the ground!" He would immediately get on the floor and let them win for a little while and then break free. The girls thought they were hot stuff when they were beating their big brother at wrestling. The first day of school picks can both make me smile and cry at the exact same time.

The comments I posted were, in some cases, even more entertaining than the pictures. The pics made me think of simpler times and the comments made me laugh out loud. They say the best medicine is laughter, and I have to believe that is true. Apparently, when the girls were 6 and 9 the youngest said to the oldest, "Is that the lady you can’t stand, but have never met in your life?" What does that even mean? When my second son was 12 he encouraged me with these words, "I guess you are glad you have to clean up dinner. Now when you go back and un-pause your show you can skip the commercials." I never felt so lucky in all my life.

Funny and sad at the same time was when the youngest got excited to ask Santa for a special gift for Christmas. I guess she had outgrown the Spiderman bike that had been handed down through all the kids and she just wanted Santa to bring her "a new bike, one that she wouldn’t bang her knees on the handlebars when she peddled". Another Christmas favorite was when we were at the mall 2 days before Christmas to have our picture taken with Santa and my then 7 year old daughter asked why there were so many men shopping that day. Things that make you go hmmmm? Two years later my 12 year-old daughter said, "I hope I get something I really want for Christmas." Which, her 9 year-old sister quickly replied, "Like a newborn baby?" So I guess Christmas quotes can be both funny and scary at the same time. My last quote and maybe the most bizarre was when my then 8 year-old caught half a conversation. In the middle of a conversation my husband said something about us needing a limo (I think he was talking about taking the kids and each of them bringing a friend somewhere). The 8 year-old interrupts to say, "Wait, I can get you an elephant, I know a guy!" Really, she knows a guy with an elephant?

Often times we post our favorite or best pictures or comments from an event or time. Always remember, our experiences whether good or bad, funny or sad, silly or serious are the fabric of our lives. They are the moments in time that are woven together to make up the story of our lives and they keep us connected to our loved ones. The pictures of my youngest, stuck in a cow patty, or crying herself to sleep at a fireworks display, or laughing herself silly while throwing minnows back in the water with her Poppop, are all pieces of the puzzle that made her who she is today.

Embrace those pieces. Whether you are remembering a loved one you are missing, or reminiscing about your babies who are hardly babies anymore, or just want to revisit a huge belly laugh, these are what social media should be used for. It shouldn’t be to find your self-worth or see how many likes or followers you can get, but to slow down and smile and remember! Your memories are what have made you the amazing mom you are and you don’t even need one social media "like" to make that true!

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