The Holy Gospel according Mark 10:2-16
10:2 Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked,
"Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" 10:3 He
answered them, "What did Moses command you?" 10:4 They
said, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of
dismissal and to divorce her." 10:5 But Jesus said to
them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this
commandment for you. 10:6 But from the beginning of
creation, 'God made them male and female.' 10:7 'For
this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and
be joined to his wife, 10:8 and the two shall become one
flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. 10:9
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one
separate." 10:10 Then in the house the disciples asked
him again about this matter. 10:11 He said to them,
"Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits
adultery against her; 10:12 and if she divorces her
husband and marries another, she commits adultery."
10:13 People were bringing little children to him in
order that he might touch them; and the disciples spoke
sternly to them. 10:14 But when Jesus saw this, he was
indignant and said to them, "Let the little children
come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these
that the kingdom of God belongs. 10:15 Truly I tell you,
whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little
child will never enter it." 10:16 And he took them up in
his arms, laid his hands on them, and blessed them.
The Gospel of the Lord . . .
Marriage
and Family
are Matters of Life
Here is a challenging beginning for your new pastor!!
(And I thought that the call committee had asked all of
the hard questions!! Or that Seminary had prepared me
for ALL the difficult circumstances of parish life!) The
topic of Divorce is one the subjects Jesus preached
about that makes, not just me as your preacher, but, all
of us uncomfortable as we are placed in a position where
our faith and Christian walk becomes challenged by the
conditions and realities of where we all find ourselves
in light of Jesus’ words in today’s lesson.
Wanting to get my ministry with you off on the right
foot, I wish I did not even have to bring up the “D”
word, but it cannot be avoided when Jesus speaks such
strong words about Divorce in today’s lesson. But before
we go there and get very uncomfortable with ourselves in
light of what Jesus is saying. Let us consider the wider
scope and the full breadth of all of this morning’s
lessons. I want for you to especially remember the
passage from 2 Corinthians 5:17 where the Pauline writer
proclaims that “In Christ Jesus we are all new
creations, everything old has passed away!! Behold!!
Everything has become new! So do not fear not despair as
we discuss and seek out the meaning of Jesus’ words
about divorce and remarriage, but keep in mind God’s
overarching forgiveness, and mercy. In the spirit of the
Gospel there is continually opportunity for new
beginnings – and in the lesson today, perhaps a few
other surprises will be discovered from the wider
context as we explore this text.
So? How shall we interpret what Jesus is saying about
Divorce? and can we still find grace from the Gospel
that will provide relief and hope for new life beyond
our failed relationships?
Certainly it seems that, no one can undo the hurts that
we lay on one another when it comes to the issues of
divorce, and as we read these words from our Lord it
seems that there is no explaining away that divorce is
not supposed to happen according to God’s plan in
creation. But let us think for a moment about God’s acts
in creation. . .
From the Psalm we read this morning, Psalm 8, we heard
of the wonderful works of God in Creating the moon and
the stars, the sheep and the oxen and all the beasts of
the field; the birds of the air and the fish of the sea
– all things that have life and breath and even
inanimate things -- God has made. But most curious of
all: God has placed all of these living things and the
resources of earth into our hands, into our keeping. God
has entrusted us with great responsibility!
We hear this charge spelled out as the Psalmist
expresses the great honor and the inestimately high
degree of trust that God has dispensed on us: (note I
have taken the liberty to use some inclusive language in
the following re-reading of the psalm)
”What is [humankind] that you are mindful of us, our
sons and our daughters that you should seek them out?
You have made men and women but little lower than
angels; you adorn us with glory and honor; you give your
children mastery over the works of your hands; you put
all things under our care and keeping . . .” (Psalm 8).
In this reading of the psalmist’s words we hear that God
has entrusted us with the creation, with the keeping of
all created things, who can bear this great
responsibility? We can, with God’s direction and help!
But What a Great Responsibility it is to be keepers of
all creation!!
Interestingly, What a Great Responsibility we Have in
Keeping One Another. . . Luther would be quick to point
out that as a member of Christ’s church we have a
responsibility to look after our brothers and sisters
and married couples. We do this in order to Protect
their relationships from any harm. The command is not
just “Do Not” commit adultery . . . but to prevent and
to eliminate any circumstance or words that might lead
to hurting the family bond. And this matter of upholding
and protecting Christian marriage is emphasized in our
Lutheran marriage ceremony when we as a congregation,
pledge to encourage and help the marital couple keep
their vows and grow their love through the years to
come. And it is to this responsibility–the ideal of
Oneness in a marriage covenant, that Jesus’ expresses
his concern that God’s intention for marriage is for a
life long commitment.
Certainly in every marriage there are going to be
testing times. Like when one marital partner wants to go
out and the other would rather stay home. Or when the
husband intends to drive his old truck forever, but the
wise wife points out the impractical gas guzzler that it
is, and that he should buy a nice used compact car that
makes sense for the family . . . .
At times it seems that the very nature of being a man or
a woman can cause us to repel away from one another.
Jesus refers to the reasons that the Pharisees bring up
for Divorce as representing their “hardness of heart”.
This refers to the action of simply wanting to remarry
for the sake of obtaining a more desirable partner.
We must also recognize that Jesus conversation with the
Pharisees was speaking less about individual
circumstances of divorce, such as any one of us might
name as a reason that divorce is necessary: (such as)
Physical or mental abuse by one spouse or the other. Or
not caring for the children or alcohol or drug
addictions or the many negative behaviors associated
with these addictions, not mention the ill effects of
pornography, adultery or any number of other
possibilities.
In Mark’s Gospel narrative, we need to remember that
Jesus’ “verbal sparring match” with the Pharisees,
contained behind it a more dangerous circumstance for
Jesus. What we need to keep in mind is what is going on
in the background and foreground of Mark’s Gospel, where
political and spiritual forces are constantly at work,
causing Jesus to pause in his ministry in order to
address various challenges to his authority. We must
note that in the beginning of this text (though we did
not read the first verse) -- Jesus is journeying into
the region of Judea, beyond the Jordan. If we could
trace Jesus’ path up to this point we would recognize
that Jesus is traveling toward Jerusalem . . . Jesus is
journeying towards his passion and the cross.
So When the Pharisees ask him about the issue of Divorce
we know that they are attempting to entrap Jesus by the
words he will use to answer this question. And so it
comes to mind, Who else was “entrapped” by his words
when he spoke about issues of marriage and divorce?
Remember that “wild donkey of a man”, John the Baptist?
Yes, the Pharisees see that if they can get Jesus moving
down the same path as the Baptizer, then they will get
Jesus in trouble with Herod who had married his
brother’s wife after divorcing his own wife! The journey
to faithfulness for Jesus is constantly endangered by
such pit falls as the war of words with the Pharisees
can hold – nevertheless, Jesus is moving toward
Jerusalem and he carefully dispels the crafty questions
of the Pharisees by quoting the truth of God’s words
back to them.
So where does this leave us? Can we dismiss the
condemnation we feel when we know we have not been able
to uphold the “Oneness” that God intended when marriage
was sanctioned by the coming together of a man and a
woman in a covenant relationship? No, we cannot dismiss
this ideal. For as Jesus said, “The two shall become one
flesh . . . they are no longer two, but one flesh.
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one
separate.”
But instead of feeling overwhelmed by our inability to
uphold Jesus’ command, is it possible for us to
“celebrate” the strength of God’s resolve that marriage
is the highest standard of human relationships? Can we
see Jesus’ strong admonition in upholding the bonds of
marriage as a kind of protective blessing? Perhaps,
moving away from guilt and beyond the realities of our
failed relationships, we can give thanks that the will
of God is that a man and a woman find completeness in
one another, and that in spite of human frailty and sin,
the ideal remains . . . two people covenant with one
another to remain together in faithfulness – this is
honorable and this is part of the Great Responsibility
that we spoke of coming from the words of the psalmist.
And so we must hold this passage for what it is, Jesus
speaks a strong word about the value and importance of
remaining faithful to the marriage covenant. Note that
Jesus was not asked what should take place if one spouse
abuses the other in some harmful way, nor does he
address the complicated family patterns and behaviors
that can become destructive factors in our marriages.
But I think that we do get the message that divorce for
fleshly reasons, such as merely looking for a better
partner, or because of a shrewd political alliance, such
as was practiced in the days of Kings and Queens . .
This kind of divorce reasoning is as Jesus said,
“because of hardness of hearts.”
While on a camping trip in New England many years ago, I
remember meeting a man who was living alone in a small
camper trailer. We got to talking as he was doing his
laundry in the campground laundry mat. Eventually the
conversation came around to talking about his life and I
asked him, “how did you wind up living in this
campground with seemingly nothing and nobody else active
in your life?” After breathing a deep sigh, he
explained, “I met my wife when I was about your age,
that was back in “42". We met at the town roller skating
rink, and it was love at first sight. Together we Danced
and skated in contests and traveled around to many
places – winning awards for our couples’ skating.” So
what happened to your wife? I asked, genuinely
interested in his story. He hung his head and said,
“After 40 years of marriage I just lost interest, we
were finished, we just didn’t love each other anymore,
and I left.”
His story sounded incredibly sad to me. Up to this time,
Divorce had not been a part of my immediate growing up
experience -- not that everything was always “perfect”
in our household. Yet I wondered, “how could a couple
just break up after having so many years together?” . .
. . I need not answer this question, because each one of
us has witnessed or experienced the heartbreaking
realities of actions and words that cause marriages to
not work out.
So where is the grace?? How can we live honestly with
ourselves in sincerity of Faith, even with the knowledge
that we are divorced whether actually or in some cases
implicitly – can there be healing, forgiveness or even
newness of life? I think the Gospel says Yes, and we
need look no farther than the next few verses of Mark’s
Gospel where Jesus is scooping up the little children
and holding them in his arms.
The message of Jesus comes down to us when he says,
"’Let the little children come to me; do not stop them;
for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God
belongs. 10:15 Truly I tell you, whoever does not
receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never
enter it.’ 10:16 And he took them up in his arms, laid
his hands on them, and blessed them.”
Divorce need not be the end of our living in what can be
a joy-filled loving relationship. What seems more
important to take from Jesus teaching is that Marriage
is God’s plan, it is honorable and GOOD, and to be
desired. If we are going to suffer and agonize about our
condition – then let us turn that pain into the drive to
learn about our circumstances and about ourselves and
how we might become more aware of who we are and who the
other person is that we recognize in our relationships.
What I am saying here is that we need to be honest with
ourselves. If you have gone through a divorce or know
others who have then it may be good and appropriate to
take some practical steps toward getting help in order
to heal the emotional scars and to redevelop the inner
person. This kind of help is available through books,
programs or by seeking counsel, (just ask Dr. Phil!) But
seriously, in order that we will not fall into repeating
old patterns of behavior or seeking out a partner who
has the same behaviors that will cause disharmony in the
next relationship -- we need to learn from our
brokenness, we need to mend our ways.
Above all, remember that whether single or divorced in
marriage or not married at all. We are each children of
God, children entrusted with the care of many things.
And we are each NEW BEINGS fully loved by God, washed
clean by the blood of Christ, and empowered by the Holy
Spirit to go on in life as God’s Children, continually
being formed into the likeness of Jesus Christ. Amen
Let us pray, Eternal God, in our humanness we are frail
beings who sometimes hurt one another even when we have
pledged to love and cherish. Our sinful actions can
cause physical and emotional pain to our spouses and
children and to our communities. Help us dear God to
overcome anger, discord and fear – Help us to receive
your Words of forgiveness. Give us a freshness of heart
to love, to love always.
Amen
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more writings of Pastor Jon
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