You might be a Blueneck if ...

BlueNecks are Northerners --- the opposite of Rednecks ...

• Instead of referring to two or more people as "y'all," you call them "you guys," even if both of them are women.
• You think barbecue is a verb meaning "to cook outside."
• You think Heinz Ketchup is really SPICY.
• You would never stop to buy something somebody was cooking on the side of the road. (e.g., boiled peanuts) .
• You don't have any problems pronouncing "Worcestershire sauce" correctly.
• For breakfast, you would prefer potatoes-au-gratin to grits.
• You don't know what a moon pie is.
• You've never had an RC Cola.
• You've never, ever eaten okra -- fried, boiled, or pickled.
• You eat fried chicken with a knife and fork.
• You've never seen a live chicken, and the only cows you've seen are on road trips.
• You have no idea what a polecat is.
• You don't see anything wrong with putting a sweater on your dog.
• You don't have bangs.
• You would rather vacation at Martha's Vineyard than at Six Flags.
• You would rather have your son become a lawyer than grow up to get his own TV fishing show.
• You drink either "Pop" or "Soda"- instead of "Cokes."
• You've never eaten and don't know how to make a tomato sandwich.
• You have never planned your summer vacation around a gun-'n-knife show.
• You think more money should go to important scientific research at your university than to pay the salary of the head football coach
• You don't even have one can of WD-40 somewhere around the house.
• The last time you smiled was when you blocked someone from getting on an on-ramp to the highway.
• You don't have any hats in your closet that advertise feed stores.
• You have more than one professional sports team in your home state.
• The farthest south you've ever been is the perfume counter at Neiman Marcus.
• You call binoculars opera glasses.
• You can't spit out the car window without pulling over to the side of the road and stopping.
• You don't know anyone with at least two first names (i.e., Joe Bob, Faye Ellen, Billy Ray, Mary Jo, Bubba Dean, Joe Dan, Mary Alice)
• You don't know any women with male names (i.e., Tommie, Bobbie, Johnnie, Jimmie)
• You don't have Maw-maw's & Paw-paw's.
• You've never been to a craft show.
• You get freaked out when people on the subway talk to you.
• None of your fur coats are homemade.
• You have no idea who the Allisons or Pettys are.

Submitted by Kate, Columbia, Md.

Submitted by Debbie, Middletown, Md.