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"Sometimes I think war is God's
way of teaching us geography." - Paul Rodriguez
- "A slipping gear could let your M203
grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would
make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit" - Army's
Magazine of Preventive Maintenance.
- "Aim towards the Enemy" - Instruction
printed on US Rocket Launcher.
- When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade
is not our friend. (U.S. Marine Corps)
- Cluster bombing from B-52s is very,
very accurate. The bombs always hit the ground. (U.S. Air
Force)
- If the enemy is in range, so are you.
(Infantry Journal)
- It is generally inadvisable to eject
directly over the area you just bombed. (U.S. Air Force
Manual)
- Whoever said the pen is mightier than
the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons. (Gen.
MacArthur)
- Try to look unimportant; they may be
low on ammo. (Infantry Journal)
- You, you, and you ..... Panic. The
rest of you, come with me. (U.S. Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt)
- Tracers work both ways. (U.S. Army
Ordnance)
- Five-second fuses only last three
seconds. (Infantry Journal)
- Don't ever be the first, don't ever
be the last, and don't ever volunteer to do anything. (U.S.
Navy Swabbie)
- Bravery is being the only one who
knows you're afraid. (David Hackworth)
- If your attack is going too well, you
have walked into an ambush. (Infantry Journal)
- No combat-ready unit has ever passed
inspection. No inspection- ready unit ever survived combat
(Joe Gay)
- Any ship can be a minesweeper .....
once. (Admiral Hornblower)
- Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you
have nothing to do. (Unknown Recruit)
- Don't draw fire; it irritates the
people around you. (Your Buddies)
- Mines are equal-opportunity weapons.
(Saddam Hussein)
- If you find yourself in a fair fight,
you didn't plan your mission properly. (David Hackworth)
- Waterproof sleeping shelters .....
aren't.
- Smokeless powder ..... isn't.
- Always store beer in dark places.
- Get your first shot off fast. This
may upset your enemy enough to allow you to make your second
shot count.
- You can have peace --- or you can
have freedom. Don't count of having both at once.
- Place your clothes and weapons where
you can find them in the dark.
- Courage is the complement of fear. A
man who is fearless cannot be courageous.
- Peace is an extension of war by
political means.
- Anything free is worth what you pay
for it.
- When handling stinging insects, move
slowly.
- This side toward enemy. (U.S.
anti-personnel mine)
Submitted by
Tom, Fairfield, Pa.
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Lessons we can learn form
Geese ...
- Geese Fact : As each goose flaps its
wings, it creates an "uplift" for the other birds to follow.
By flying in a "V" formation, the whole flock adds 70% greater
flying range than if each bird flew alone.
Our Lesson : People who share a common
direction and a sense of community get where they are going
quicker and easier -- because they are traveling on the thrust
of one another.
- Geese Fact : When a goose falls out
of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of
flying alone. It quickly moves back into formation to take
advantage of the lifting power of the bird immediately in
front of it.
Our Lesson : If we have as much sense
as a goose, we stay in formation with those headed where we
want to go. We are willing to accept their help and give our
help to others.
- Geese Fact : When a goose tires, it
rotates to the back of the formation as another goose flies to
the point opposite.
Our Lesson : It pays to take turns
doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership. As with geese,
people are interdependent on each other's skills, capabilities
and unique arrangement of gifts, talents or resources.
- Geese Fact : The geese flying in
formation honk to encourage those up front to keep up their
speed.
Our Lesson : We need to make sure our
honking is encouraging. In groups -- where there is
encouragement to stand by one's heart or core values and
encourage the same in others -- is the sort of honking we
seek.
- Geese Fact : When a goose gets sick,
wounded or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and
follow it down to help and protect it. They stay with it until
it dies or is able to fly again. Then they launch out in
formation and try to catch the flock.
Our Lesson : If we had as much sense
as geese, we would stand by each other in difficult times as
well as when we are strong.
Submitted by
Debbie,
Middletown, Md.
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This years top cute pet pictures ... take
5 ... I swear to god the mouse was this big ...
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August
29th Humor Page |
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