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A young couple got
married and went on their honeymoon.
When they got back, the
bride immediately called her mother. "Well," said her
mother, "So how was the honeymoon?"
"Oh, mama," she replied, "The honeymoon was wonderful! So
romantic..." Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as
soon as we returned, Sam started using the most horrible
language -- things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these
awful 4-letter words! You've got to take me home..., PLEASE
MAMA!"
"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! You need to
stay with your husband and work this out. Now, tell me, what
could be so awful? WHAT 4-letter words?"
"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter,
"I'm so embarrassed, they're just too awful! COME GET ME,
PLEASE!!"
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell
your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"
Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, Mama..., he used words
like: dust, wash, iron, cook..."
"I'll pick you up in twenty minutes," said the mother.
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Sister's Jokes,
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Ever wonder
...
- Why the sun lightens our hair, but
darkens our skin?
- Why women can't put on mascara
with their mouths closed?
- Why you don't ever see the
headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
- Why "abbreviated" is such a long
word?
- Why is it that doctors call what
they do "practice"?
- Why lemon juice is made with
artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real
lemons?
- Why is the man who invests all
your money called a broker?
- Why is the time of day with the
slowest traffic called rush hour?
- Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat
food?
- Why didn't Noah swat those two
mosquitoes?
- Why do they sterilize the needle
for lethal injections?
- You know that indestructible black
box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the
whole plane out of that stuff?!
- Why don't sheep shrink when it
rains?
- Why are they called apartments
when they are all stuck together?
- If con is the opposite of pro, is
Congress the opposite of progress?
- If flying is so safe, why do they
call the airport the terminal?
Submitted by Sister Wink, The
Bronx, Ny.
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In a rush to get things done,
I ran across this story and thought you might appreciate
reading it.
It certainly gave me
something to ponder!
There's a story of a fisherman who
was sitting on the dock one early afternoon with a few fish
in his possession.
A rich business man--a visitor from
out of town--said "Why aren't you out there fishing this
afternoon?"
The fisherman said, "I've caught all
I need for today... and I'm just sitting back here, smoking
my pipe and enjoying the beautiful day."
"But", the businessman objected, "if
you were to use your time fishing, you could catch more fish
and then sell what you don't need and make some extra
money."
"And then what?" replied the
fisherman.
"Well," replied the business man,
"after saving enough money from your sales, you could buy a
new and bigger boat that would take you out further into sea
and you could catch bigger fish and make even more money."
"And then what?" said the fisherman.
"Well, then you could buy a whole
fleet of boats and catch thousands of fish and make
thousands of dollars in one day and become rich like me."
"And then what?" asked the
fisherman.
"Well," then you could sit back and
enjoy life like I do" said the rich man.
"Well," said the fisherman, "Isn't
that what I'm doing already?"
Submitted by Linn, Hagerstown,
Md.
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April
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