Holding hands they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they'd shared, where Andy had carved "I love you, Sally."

On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up, but not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money--fifty-thousand dollars.

Andy said, "We've got to give it back."

Sally said, "Finders keepers." She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.

The next day, two FBI men were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knock on the door. "Pardon me, but did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armored car yesterday?" Sally said, "No."

Andy said, "She's lying. She hid it up in the attic."

Sally said, "Don't believe him, he's getting senile."

The agents turn to Andy and began to question him. One says: "Tell us the story from the beginning."

Andy said, "Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday . "

The first FBI guy turns to his partner and says, "We're outta here."

"Sure; what'll it be?" the waitress responds.

"I'll have some watery scrambled eggs .. and some burnt toast ... and some weak coffee, lukewarm." says the man.

"Whatever you say, sir." says the waitress.

The man then says "Now, are you doing anything while the order is going through?"

"Why - no sir." she responds.

"Great" says the man "then sit here and nag me a while ... I'm homesick!"

• Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?
• Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
• Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
• Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
• Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
• Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
• Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
• Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
• If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
• Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
• Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
• Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
• Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
• Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
• How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
• When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"
• Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manages to knock something else over?

• "I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." - General George S. Patton.
• "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." - Norman Schwartzkopf.
• "We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it." - Marge Simpson
• "As far as I’m concerned, war always means failure" - Jacques Chirac, President of France
• "As far as France is concerned, you’re right." - Rush Limbaugh
• "The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee." - Regis Philbin.
• "The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore."
• "True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whisky I don’t know." - P.J O’Rourke (1989).
• "You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn’t have the face for it." - John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona.
• "You know why the French don’t want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people!" - Conan O’Brien
• "I don’t know why people are surprised that France won’t help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn’t help us get Hitler out of France either" - Jay Leno.
• "The last time the French asked for ‘more proof’ it came marching into Paris under a German flag." - David Letterman
• "Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada." - Ted Nugent.
• "War without France would be like … uh … World War II."
• "The favorite bumper sticker in Washington now is one that says ‘First Iraq, then France.’" - Tom Brokaw.
• "What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against Disney World and Big Macs than the Nazis?" - Dennis Miller.
• "It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us." - Alan Kent
• "They’ve taken their own precautions against al-Qa’ida. To prepare for an attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white flag, and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house." - Argus Hamilton
• "Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day – the description was, ‘Never shot. Dropped once.’" - Rep. Roy Blunt (MO)
• "The French will only agree to go to war when we’ve proven we’ve found truffles in Iraq." - Dennis Miller
• "Raise your right hand if you like the French… Raise both hands if you are French."
• Q. What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered the city in WWII? A. Table for 100,000 m’sieur?
• "Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to defend Paris? It’s not known, it’s never been tried."  - Rep. R. Blount (MO)
• "Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII? And that’s because it was raining." - John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv.
• The AP and UPI reported that the French Government announced after the London bombings that it has raised its terror alert level from Run to Hide. The only two higher levels in France are Surrender and Collaborate. The rise in the alert level was precipitated by a recent fire which destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively disabling their military.
• French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney -  (AP), Paris, March 5, 2003 - The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.